Well, I'm sad to say that my Brazil trip has come to an end. The good news is that I'm still in auditing for at least 2 more years so there is still time for them to send me back!
In order for my next story to make sense, I have to tell a little joke.
A man is house sitting for his brother--feeding the cat, getting the mail, etc. The brother calls to check in.
"I'm sorry," says the man, "but your cat died."
"What do you mean the cat died? How could you do this to me? You should have prepared me for the shock," says the man's brother.
"How was I supposed to prepare you?" asks the man.
"Well," says the brother, "first you should have told me, the cat is on the roof, but don't worry, we're calling the fire department. Then, the next time we talked you should have said, the fire department was doing everything it could and not to worry. Then the next time I called you can tell me that the cat had fallen, but not to worry--the vet was doing everything she could to resuscitate him. Then, finally, you could have told me, the cat had died."
"Sorry, I should have though first" said the man, who was quite embarrassed at this point.
"So anyway how is mom?"
"Um," says the man, "Mom is on the roof...."
I told that joke at dinner one night and apparently they have the same joke here but it has become almost a common saying where your boss might ask "Are you almost done with those TPS reports I asked for?" and you would reply "The cat is on the roof." a.k.a. I haven't even started them.
So during one of our status meetings, when our senior audit manager would ask how things are going, I wanted to reply-in Portuguese-"The cat is on the roof". Unfortunately, I never found a good time to do it so the idea failed but for those of you who know how funny I think I am, please know I'm quite pleased with myself for even coming up with the joke. It would have been even better if it has actually been executed.
We left work by 6:30 on Thursday because we were pretty much done (I felt bad b/c we only even stayed that late because I had a meeting from 5-6 that wasn't even audit related!). The exit meeting was planned for Friday morning. So I went back to my hotel, ate dinner, and then decided to kill some time on the internet and pack. When you buy internet at the hotel I'm staying at, you have to use it as soon as you buy it. I figured, play on the internet first, then pack. Unfortunately, I didn't know that before my 2 hours of internet had expired the power would go out and I would be left to pack in the dark. Thank goodness for my resourcefulness. I pulled up one of those "this page cannot be displayed screens" and used the white light to light the area around my suitcase which I had previously piled up with all the stuff I needed to pack. I have to say, when the lights came on about an hour and a half later I was already done and in reviewing my work, I have to say it looked pretty good.
My favorite waiter in the hotel has continued to give me a bottle of water every morning while I wait for my ride. I think I'm really going to miss him when I'm back in Midland. Other things I'm going to miss.
1. The dental floss in the bathroom.
2. The toilet seat covers that just have a heart cut out in the middle instead of that weird flappy thing you have to tear.
3. The delicious food that I was able to enjoy.
4. That guy in the elevator that I never saw again.
5. The day I got to have a bodyguard.
6. And of course, all the guys on my audit team! I can't remember another audit where I've laughed so much!
Of course, there is always the good with the bad. Here are some things I won't miss.
1. That game the guys play where they leave me in the conference room by myself.
2. Choosing my outfit for the day from a closet of 7 identical button down shirts (in different colors of course) and a dress.
3. Not being able to leave the hotel by myself. It was like having a curfew all over again!
Clearly the good outweighs the bad!
The plane ride home was pretty non-eventful. I sat next to a guy who worked for John Deere. He was friendly enough. I don't think I mentioned that the guy on the way over worked for Goodyear. Conveniently, 2 companies that I know almost nothing about. The John Deere guy was from Kansas City and since I've been there, I did have some stuff to talk to him about so that was good. I also watched the movie Enchanted which is not by any means an academy award winning movie but I secretly enjoy cheesy movies.
My flight out of Chicago was delayed--shocking, I know. But for the first time I ran into someone at the airport going to Midland that I actually knew! You would think with Midland being so small, it would happen more often but it doesn't.
Of course, the 70 degree weather that Midland had last week is gone and it was in the 50s for my return. But it's supposed to creep back up during the week so I have a feeling summer will be here before too long! I don't have any trips planned until July and that's my vacation to Turkey! So, if you're looking for something to do this summer, now is the perfect time to come visit me!
